I’m just trying to figure it out

I took the first scary jump of handling my hair situation. It started with a small snip of the split ends, then came two more bold chops in two consequent months. With the new do came fore-seen challenges. Challenges that only women with short textured hair can relate to. Right now, I’m fumbling through which products to use, and how to keep it sane. But I must say it’s fun to run my fingers through the kinkiness when I’m bored.  And I love that it’s tough, kinky, and mine. But this is such a strange stage. Because honestly, I’m just trying to figure it out.

I’m not the best at spending or saving money. But I surely must appreciate that I have come a long way. The hustles and bustles of being on the grind trying to make a coin independently, comes with great rewards. But age and some newfound experience teaches me the importance of learning to work, and enjoy my hard earned money; but also being wise enough while doing it . I’m learning that every woman should be sensible enough to save for a rainy day. That the money you make should be able to help a person other than yourself. That money comes and goes. And the hard lesson that unexpected things can happen, that require your financial attention; and have the potential to throw your financial plans off balance. I guess i’m getting better at this whole financial aspect. But this is such a strange stage. Because honestly, I’m just trying to figure it out.

I’m very entrepreneurial in my own right. I guess going to get what I want is an easy concept for me. I’ve had a job in sales, I’ve been an intern in an architectural firm, and have also been an intern in an interior design firm. I’ve have also successfully started and run two small businesses on my own. I’ve done African jewelry and cupcakes all in different time spans. Additionally, I tutor guitar, I run my own blog, and I write on the sides too. I love all that I’ve learnt through the different brief “career” paths I’ve had. Their extreme differences have taught me invaluable lessons, and I want to try a few more; just before I can chose a suitable business venture for my future. Additionally, I’m trying to build my professional interior design career as well. With this comes the massive attempts to master my craft, and learn as many skills as necessary. Because it is important for me to raise my competencies, to levels that will be beneficial to myself and to the organizations I shall work for. But it takes a lot of discipline to juggle all that I set out. And I must say this is such a strange stage. Because honestly, I’m just trying to figure it out.

I love this journey into womanhood. It comes with learning: how to look and feel my best, how to make the most of my day, how to be the most helpful at home, how to make little steps towards my five year plan. Additionally, I’m learning to multitask like every great woman should. I’m also learning how to be a better daughter, a better sister, a better aunt, and a better friend. Most importantly, the day to day running’s teaches me how to incorporate other people in my life other than myself. Although I must say this is a struggle. Why? Because I really value alone time. Then comes the issues of patience, grace and self-respect. The learning curve has proven that people will treat you how you want them to. That having respectable levels of standards, has such vast positive outcomes. That we are responsible to make proactive choices for ourselves that will either uplift our lives, or drop us down a steep cliff. That good things come to those who wait. That respect is two way. And that being patient, gracious but at the same headstrong; will pull more positive people into your space. But again, isn’t some of these common sense items that we often choose to overlook? I must say, this is such a strange stage. Because honestly, I’m just trying to figure it out.

I’m a bit precautious, about the whole dating scene. Because so many forget that a love partnership takes really high levels of: respect, consideration, humility, mutual understanding, and independence on both ends.  But mainly because it is really easy to forget that actions mean more than uttered words. Let’s not even get to the fact that there are hundreds of mediocre men strutting themselves around. But we must agree, no one is really perfect right? And I cant honestly take away the fact that there are so many amazing individuals as well. But i must admit, it gets so lonely sometimes. Then unexpectedly, being single gets so comfortable; that the idea of dating seems like a complete inconvenience. But with all those personal milestones to achieve, would it be sane to introduce someone else into the frenzy? This is such a strange stage. Because honestly, I’m just trying to figure it out.

What are you trying to figure out? please let me know in the comment section below.

Like, share, follow and have a lovely week ahead.


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2 thoughts on “I’m just trying to figure it out

  1. Effortless flair in your writing. Its been sometime since I read something that so thoroughly relates to me. Perhaps, stewing over the figuring out process for a tad more isn’t a bad idea as I might have thought. Props to you Abby.


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